In a world full of unimaginable absurdity, we spend a lot of time thinking about the future… and to where all of this insanity leads.
“Future Headline Friday” is our satirical take of where the world is going if it remains on its current path. While our satire may be humorous and exaggerated, rest assured that everything we write is based on actual events, news stories, personalities, and pending legislation.
July 21, 2026: Prince Harry’s Feature Film on Hunter Biden Nominated for Emmy
Hollywood is buzzing after Prince Harry’s first feature film was nominated for an Emmy.
The Struggle of Privilege chronicles the tumultuous life of Hunter Biden in a gripping tale of adversity, survival, and the power of resilience.
The film was a real passion project for Prince Harry, his first time to write, produce, and direct.
But first on Harry’s mind, more important than everything else, was his commitment to equity, diversity, and inclusion. That’s why he chose to have all the characters in his film played by actors of color.
One of the most gripping scenes is when Hunter, played by Will Smith, confronts his father, played by George Takei, over which son he loved more— Hunter, or his deceased brother Beau.
Prince Harry said he was inspired to write the film after being denied his request to fly with President Biden on Air Force One on the return trip to the US after Queen Elizabeth II’s funeral.
“I realized I had to bring something to the table for the Biden family,” Prince Harry said.
“Then I thought about how unfairly Hunter had been treated by the media and by the far right. Commoners just don’t understand the pressure of being born into extreme privilege. I guess you could say I saw a bit of myself in Hunter, and I thought, I need to make the public see Hunter for the heroic figure he is.”
But the film does not shy away from the controversy in Hunter’s life.
It delves into his sexual relationship with his dead brother’s wife, played by Meghan Markle.
It also chronicles Hunter’s crack binges and legal troubles. One dramatic scene in the movie shows Hunter suffering the extreme indignity of his 2023 plea deal in which he avoided jail time in exchange for pleading guilty to lesser charges.
“Well, it’s still on his permanent record,” Prince Harry said, dismissing any suggestions of favoritism as Russian disinformation.
Of course, Hunter didn’t fight his noble fight alone. The film shows how former Attorney General Merrick Garland, played by rap diva Cardi B, shielded Hunter from the unfair consequences of his crimes.
In one thrilling scene, a courageous Justice Department official races against the clock to make sure Twitter and Facebook executives banned the Hunter laptop story from their platforms before it leaked out.
But what really got critics raving was the depiction of poise and grace that Hunter displayed when he was again convicted in 2024 of extortion, money laundering, and human trafficking.
In fact, the climax of the film shows Hunter’s 2024 crack-fueled three-day bender in which he drove across state lines with several prostitutes to threaten his drug dealer.
In exchange for 6 months of house arrest, prosecutors dropped the charges of making a threat with a deadly weapon, drug possession, possession of an unregistered firearm, and discharging a firearm in a school zone.
When arrested, Hunter’s phone contained evidence of money laundering, reportedly including photos of cash stuffed into a washing machine as a joke.
He then texted the photos to an anonymous contact known only as “The Big Guy” with the text, “From Ukraine with love LOL. No but seriously, it’s washed. We’re good.”
Asked for comment on whether or not the film was a fair depiction of his son’s life, President Biden said, “Ever since my son Hunter died in Vietnam, he’s been plagued by LGBT. Sorry PTSD. The film showed how he copes with being a famous artist whose dad is a Senator, and he who is without sin, let him cast the… the… you know the thing.”
Some on the far-right have criticized the film for leaving out any mention that President Biden was a key sponsor of the 1994 Crime Bill, a piece of legislation that imposed mandatory minimum sentences, three-strikes rules, and other measures that have resulted in lengthy prison sentences for many Americans.
But these attacks have fallen flat. The film is a testament to the flexibility of our justice system, which can adapt to the unique circumstances of each case.
Hunter Biden’s sentences are shining examples of how far we’ve come since the 1994 Crime Bill. It’s a reminder that while no one is above the law, our justice system is not without its heart.
That’s why the final scene of The Struggle of Privilege is so moving.
Hunter realizes he is not alone, as a close friend and Chinese billionaire buys Hunter and his redeemed drug dealer side-by-side $40 million mansions in Malibu.
The film closes with the two getting ready to enjoy their six months of house arrest as neighbors. As the credits roll, a helicopter lands and girls emerge to celebrate Hunter’s redemption party.
Prince Harry, moved by his film’s Emmy nomination this morning, released the following statement on Threads:
“Sometimes all people see is the enormous mansions and private jets. The opportunities for 8-figure podcast and streaming deals that just fall into your lap. The high caliber connections that can open every door in the world. But people don’t realize how difficult all that wealth and privilege can be.”