Originally published via Armageddon Prose:
Senator Bobby Menendez — a Person of Color™ Latinx from the great, totally uncorrupt state of New Jersey — stands accused, seemingly credibly, of comic book-level corruption, including allegedly stashing more than a half million dollars in hard cash inside of various garments.
You’ll never guess what his defense is.
Color yourself shocked.
Via the New Jersey Globe:
“For years, forces behind the scenes have repeatedly attempted to silence my voice and dig my political grave. Since this investigation was leaked nearly a year ago, there has been an active smear campaign of anonymous sources and innuendos to create an air of impropriety where none exists.
The excesses of these prosecutors is apparent. They have misrepresented the normal work of a Congressional office. On top of that, not content with making false claims against me, they have attacked my wife for the longstanding friendships she had before she and I even met.
Those behind this campaign simply cannot accept that a first-generation Latino American from humble beginnings could rise to be a U.S. Senator and serve with honor and distinction. Even worse, they see me as an obstacle in the way of their broader political goals.”
It’s like these people’s PR servants don’t even try to come up with convincing defense of their clients anymore.
How many hundreds of thousands of dollars, if not millions, do you suppose the Menendez (Alleged) Crime Family (MACF) is currently spending on legal and public relations services?
And yet rehashing tired talking points about White Supremacy™ or whatever seems to be the best they can do.
An intern totally phoning it in could have come up with something better than “they hate me for my exotic and spicy ethnic roots.”
Ben Bartee, author of Broken English Teacher: Notes From Exile, is an independent Bangkok-based American journalist with opposable thumbs.
For hip Armageddon Prose t-shirts, hats, etc., peruse the merch store.
Insta-tip jar and Bitcoin public address: bc1qvq4hgnx3eu09e0m2kk5uanxnm8ljfmpefwhawv